In proportion as you increase your confidence in yourself by the affirmation of what you wish to be, your ability will increase.
He only is beaten who admits it.
Hold the thought of superiority and you will become superior.
Any people of real ability do little things all their lives because they are the victims of discouraging self-suggestions. Whenever they attempt to do anything, they allow their minds to dwell on the possibility of failure, and they picture the consequent humiliation of it all until they cripple their powers of initiative.
One of the worst things that can ever happen to a person is to get it into his head that he was born unlucky and that the Fates are against him. There are no Fates, outside of our own mentality. We are our own Fates. We control our own destiny.
In every town where people are complaining that their environment is against them and that there are no opportunities, others under the same conditions manage to succeed and make themselves felt in the world.
What can you do for a man who thinks he was born for failure? It is as impossible for success to come from the failure thought as for roses to come from thistle seeds. When one is greatly worried about failure or poverty, when he thinks much about it, he impresses his sub-consciousness with the very idea of failure, and develops unfavorable conditions. In other words, his thought, his mental attitude, is making impossible the very thing he is trying to accomplish.
We attribute much to luck or a cruel fate which belongs to our thought. We see people right alongside of us apparently with no greater ability wonderfully prosperous, while we are very indifferently so or perhaps total failures, and we are apt to think that there is a mysterious destiny which helps them, and that there is something outside of ourselves which keeps us back. But the probabilities are that the fault is in our thought, in our attitude of mind.
The trouble with us is that we do not half know how to jack ourselves up, so to speak. We are not severe enough with ourselves, not exacting enough; do not demand enough of ourselves. We should see ourselves in a much grander light; should think of ourselves as superb beings with infinite, divine possibilities. don’t be afraid of thinking too highly of yourself, for if the Creator made you, you must have inherited divine, omnipotent possibilities, you must partake of His qualities.
There is a powerful magic, a real creative force, in trying to become that which you wish to be, in assuming the character you would be like, assuming the qualities you would attain.
You want health. Never allow yourself to think that anything else will come to you. Assume the health attitude, think health, talk it. Say to yourself that it is your birthright.
The same is true in regard to prosperity. Do not allow yourself to think that anything else can come to you but prosperity. Assume the prosperity attitude, thought, manner. Act like a prosperous, progressive man, dress like one, think like one. Be sure that your mental picture, your mental altitude, is the Tpattern of that which you would like to be a reality.
If you wish to be brave, courageous, hold persistently the fearless thought, the thought that you are afraid of nothing, that nothing can make you a coward.
If you are timid, if you suffer from shyness, just affirm that you will never again be afraid of anybody or anything, that you are going to hold your head up; assert your manhood or womanhood. Resolve that you will strengthen this weak link in your character.
Assuming an indifferent air often helps diffident, shy people. Just say to yourself: “Other people are too busy to bother about me or to look at me and watch me, and, even if they do, it makes no difference to me. I am going to live in my own way.”
If one is inclined to be retiring, shrinking, shy, the constant affirmation of the “I am” philosophy, the continual assertion, “I am a man made to do things, and I am going to do them,”—a little daily practise in cultivating courage and self-confidence, aggressiveness in pushing oneself into responsibility, will do wonders in building up, from a timid one, a bold, strong character.
If your parents and teachers tell you that you are dull and stupid, just deny it vigorously every time the suggestion comes to you. Constantly affirm that you are not stupid, that you have ability and that you are going to show the people who have disapproved of you that you can do what others do.
You will find that just in proportion as you increase your confidence in yourself by the affirmation of what you wish to be, your ability will increase.
No matter what other people may think about your ability never allow yourself to doubt that you can do or become what you long to do or become. Increase your self-confidence in every possible way, and you can do this to a remarkable degree by the power of self-suggestion.
There is a great asset, a splendid capital, in the personal suggestion. Always try to carry yourself in such a way and conduct yourself in such a manner as to suggest success, growth, improvement, superiority. The very reputation of growing, of being vigorously progressive, of being a man who does things, a man who carries weight and who stands for something in his community, is worth everything.
Every time you meet an acquaintance, whether conscious of it or not, you step upon the scales of his judgment, and he notes whether you weigh more or less than at the last meeting. Everybody you meet puts his measuring line about you and notes your girth. If when they meet you people see that you are looking upward, and that you are a little further on, a little higher up, that you are a little bigger man, stand for a little more than at the last meeting, you will establish yourself in their estimation as a common man.
Never allow yourself to think meanly, narrowly, poorly of yourself. Never regard yourself as weak, inefficient, diseased, but as perfect, complete, whole. Never even think of the possibility of going through life a failure or a partial failure.
Failure and misery are not for the man who has seen the God-side of himself, who has been in touch with divinity. They are for those who have never discovered themselves and their God-like qualities.
Stoutly assert that there is a place for you in the world, and that you are going to fill it like a man. Train yourself to expect great things of yourself. Never admit even by your manner that you think you are destined to do little things all your life. If you practice and persistently hold the positive, producing, opulent thought, this mental attitude will some day make a place for you, and create that which you desire. Bear in mind that nothing will come to you without a sufficient cause, and that cause is mental.
Thoughts are forces, and by them we create ourselves and our conditions. These little force points are constantly chiseling, molding the character, fashioning the life. We cannot get away from our thought. We must be like it.
Someone has said, “All human duty is boiled down into this, learn what to think and think it.” St. Paul understood the philosophy of right thinking and he knew that these ideals held constantly in the mind will leaven the whole character and reshape the life. We are beginning to learn the profound philosophy in his advice: “Whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”
“Think on these things.” He did not mean just to run them through the mind like water through a sieve, to merely pass them over lightly, but to dwell upon, contemplate them, hold them in the mind until they permeate the life, and become a permanent habit, a part of one’s very being.
Just think of what the opposite advice would mean, to dwell upon and harbor in the mind things foul, demoralizing, and debauching: impurity, hatred, revenge, discord, jealousy, and all the human passions to which St. Paul refers!
Dwelling upon the criminal thought produces the criminal. Dwelling upon the impurity suggestion makes the debauchee. St. Paul knew that it was the things that we dwell upon, contemplate, think about habitually, concentrate the mind upon, that determine the quality of the life. There never was better advice given by any human being than this of St. Paul’s.
I cannot get away from myself, no matter where I go. I am always environed by myself, horizoned by my mentality, encircled by my ideal, constantly influenced by my self-suggestion.
If my thought is narrow, I must live in a narrow world. If my thinking has been sordid, cold, and unsympathetic, I cannot enjoy the broader and larger world others live in, for I have incapacitated myself to see it or to appreciate it. If I am mean, contemptible, and despicable in my conduct, then I am shut in by an ever-narrowing horizon, limited by the smallness and meanness of my thoughts.
If I am a person of mean, vicious habits, compelled to look through the bars behind which my vile or vicious thoughts and suggestions have imprisoned me, I cannot complain of the loneness, the wretchedness of my condition. The cell which confines me is opened and shut by my will; locked by my volition.
Yet, while we cannot get out of our atmosphere, we can change it by changing our thought, our attitude towards life. The quality of the thought determines the quality of the atmosphere. We have it in our power to live in a Paradise or a Hades. The thought determines it all.
It is now a well-established fact that victims of bad habits can be wonderfully benefited by resolving, upon retiring and dropping into unconsciousness, that they will have nothing more to do with drink, drugs, or the vicious habit which has been enslaving them.
How can you expect to get the maximum of efficiency when worry, fear, anxiety, discouragement, or melancholy are sapping twenty-five, fifty, or seventy-five percent, of your mental energy? You must clear the mind of its enemies; otherwise you pay the penalty in exhausted vitality, in wasted energy.
The auto-jealous suggestion has shattered numberless lives, even when there was no foundation whatever in fact. There is nothing short of crime that will create such a frightful havoc in the human mind as jealousy. What awful wrecks have been caused by this terrible fiend! Beautiful characters have been tom all to pieces and ruined in a few months by it. How many people have lived for years in perfect torture when there was absolutely no cause or real reason for it! What nameless crimes are committed by people who were kindly disposed, people naturally honest, but whose minds have been perverted, wrecked, by the harboring of this frightful enemy of peace and happiness!
The jealous man who thinks he has been seriously wronged, harbors the thought of revenge, and thinks of ways and means of getting “square” with his enemy until he finally takes his life. He may not have intended it at first, or even thought it possible; but his mind became abnormal by harboring the jealous thought. His desire for revenge grew until finally his mind was unbalanced and he committed the terrible deed.
Whatever weighs upon the mind, the anxious thought, worry thought, fear thought, paralyzes its producing power.
It is marvelous what mental strength can be developed by the perpetual affirmation of vigorous fitness, strength, power, efficiency,—these are thoughts and ideals that make a strong man.
You can certainly use your brain power to better advantage than in dwelling upon and rehearsing unpleasant experiences. No matter if people do not use you right, just say to yourself: “I am too big to put myself upon the level of those who stoop to lowdown, mean methods. Whatever other people do, I must act the part of a man. Life means too much to allow non-essentials to destroy my peace of mind or ruin my efficiency. I have to make good by delivering to the world in all its integrity the message which was given me at birth, which was marked out for me in my very constitution, and indicated in every fiber of my being. Because other people refuse to deliver their message or divert it, because they squander their time in that which impairs their ability and destroys their efficiency, is no reason why I should fail to deliver mine.”
The next time you are in a discordant mood, when you feel cross and crabbed and out of sorts with everybody, when little things nettle you, and you can not get along with your office boy or stenographer, when you seem to antagonize those about you, when your brain is confused and you feel that you can not control yourself, just try this experiment: Stop work. Jump right up from your desk; leave whatever you are doing, and go out of doors. Walk a few blocks, or, if possible, slip out into the country and determine that you will drive out of your mind everything that fights against harmony and mental balance. Think of beautiful, harmonious things, pleasant things. Resolve that whatever comes you will be cheerful and poised, that you will not let little nagging things make a fool of you, that you will keep your mental instrument in tune.
In other words, resolve to be a man, to rise above the petty things of life. Just say to yourself, “What a ridiculous thing for a great, strong man, made to dominate the forces of the universe, to be completely upset, thrown off his base by trivial, foolish, insignificant things!” Resolve that you will go back to your work poised, self-possessed, self-respecting, and that you will put it through with power. Reason this way for a few minutes, in the open air if possible; take in full, deep breaths of fresh air, and you will return to your task a new man.
You will be surprised to find how well it will pay you to take time to put yourself in tune. No matter when you get out of tune, stop working, refuse to do another thing until you are yourself, until you are back on the throne of your mental kingdom.
The way to get the best out of yourself is to put things right up to yourself, handle yourself without gloves, and talk to yourself as you would to a son of yours of whom you expected great things.
When you go into an undertaking just say to yourself, “Now this thing is right up to me. I’ve got to make good, to show the man in me or the coward. There is no backing out.”
Repeat to yourself some sterling, inspiring gritty bits of poetry or sayings such as, “Give me the man who faces what he must.”
You will be surprised to see how quickly this sort of self-suggestion will brace you up and put new spirit in you.
I have a friend who has helped himself wonderfully by talking to himself about his conduct. When he feels that he is not doing all that he ought to, that he has made some foolish mistake or has failed to use good sense and good judgment in any transaction, when he feels that his stamina and his ambition are deteriorating, he goes off alone to the country, to the woods if possible, and has a good heart-to-heart-talk with himself something after this fashion:
“Now, young man, you need a good talking-to, a bracing-up all along the line. You are going stale, your standards are dropping, your ideals are getting dull, and the worst of it all is that when you do a poor job, or are careless about your dress and indifferent in your manner, you do not feel as troubled as you used to. You are not making good. This lethargy, this inertia, this indifference, if you’re not very careful, will seriously cripple your career. You are letting a lot of good chances slip by you, because you are not as progressive and up-to-date as you ought to be.
“Your ideals need rubbing up. They are getting dim. In short, you are becoming lazy. You like to take things easy. Nobody ever yet amounted to much who let his energies flag, his standards drop, and his ambition ooze out. Now, I am going to keep right after you, young man, until you are doing yourself justice. This sort of take-it-easy policy will never land you at the goal you started for. You will have to watch yourself very closely, or you will be left behind.
“You are capable of doing something much better than what you are doing. You must start out today with a firm resolution to make the returns tonight from your work greater than ever before.
You must be a conqueror, and make this a red-letter day. Bestir yourself, get the cobwebs out of your head, brush off the brain ash. Think, think, think, to some purpose! Do not mull and mope like this. You are only half-alive; get a move on you!”
This young man says he hauls himself “over the coals,” as he calls it, every morning when he finds that his standards are down and he feels lazy and indifferent, in order to force himself up to a higher standard and put himself in tune for the day. It is the very first thing to which he attends.
He constantly chides himself for inaction, indifference, laziness, lack of energy. “Now, John,” he says to himself, “Brace up. Make this day count, don’t let any opportunity slip. Seize it, wring every possibility out of it. don’t shrink from responsibility, no matter how hard or disagreeable, if there is valuable discipline in it, if it will help to make you more efficient, more self-confident. don’t try to get out of anything which will help you, which will make you a stronger and larger man.”
He forces himself to do the most disagreeable tasks first, and does not allow himself to skip hard problems. “Now, don’t be a coward,” he says to himself, “If others have done this, you can do it. ”
By years of stern discipline of this kind he has done wonders with himself. He began as a poor boy living in the slums of New York with no one to take an interest in him, encourage, or push him. Though he had little opportunity for schooling when he was a small boy, he has given himself a splendid education, mainly since he was twenty-one. For many years he took up one study after another during his spare evenings, holidays, and odd moments, conquering and becoming proficient in each in its turn, until he has made himself a well-educated and broadly read man. He excels as a conversationalist and is a most interesting character. I have never known anyone else who carried on such a vigorous campaign in self-victory, self-development, self-training, self-culture as this young man has.
You habitual worriers, you people who have suffered the tortures of the damned for many years from disheartening experiences, the blue devils, suppose you call a halt and say to yourself, “Now, haven’t I given about enough of the years of my life to worry and anxiety? For years I have been robbed of my sleep, have been made miserable a large part of my time by these detestable enemies of my comfort, my welfare, my prosperity, my health and my happiness.”
“Now, John, isn’t it about time you called a halt on all this miserable business? For a quarter of a century or more you have been a slave of worry, a miserable victim of anxiety. You have lived in constant terror of the expectancy of bad business, hard times, probable panics. There has never been a year since your young manhood that you have enjoyed the peace of mind, the satisfaction, and the contentment that is the birthright of every human being bearing the stamp of divinity.”
To pull in the breath and blow it out again in constant fear and terror that something is going to happen is miserable existence, not living.
Every time you feel fear coming into your mind, shut it out as quickly as possible and apply the antidote—fearlessness, assurance. Picture yourself as absolutely fearless. Say to yourself, “I am no coward. Cowards fear and cringe and crawl but I am a man. Fear is a child’s frailty. It is not for grown-ups. I positively refuse to stoop to such a degrading thing. Fear is an abnormal mental process and I am normal. Fear cannot influence me, for I will not harbor it. I will not allow it to cripple my career.”
There is no fate or destiny which puts one man down and another up. “It is not in our stars, but in ourselves, that we are underlings.” He only is beaten who admits it. The man is inferior who admits that he is inferior, who voluntarily takes an inferior position because he thinks the best things were intended for somebody else. This is all nonsense. The world belongs to him who can conquer it. Good things belong to those who can take them by force of purpose and tenacity of determination. There is no power which parcels out good things to a favored few, and gives you and me inferior things.
The man who has acquired the power of keeping his mind filled with the thoughts which uplift and encourage, the optimistic thought, the cheerful, hopeful thought, has solved one of the great riddles of life.
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