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Re(3): Listening to the notorious
IP: 24.47.21.142
Posted on January 22, 2006 at 05:49:04 PM by Sara
Carl,
The only way to learn patience is by dealing with people who make you feel impatient.
There are certain tricks I've learned along the way to help me. One is to see people as children. I can always look at a face and turn it into a child's. It's easier to be patient with a child than an adult, and, actually, it is essentially the truth of the matter. Most people's faults are a result of immaturity, not a desire to harm or hurt others.
The second thing I do is to think about all the numerous instances when I've acted like an idiot and people were patient with me. I can apply this to any "sin" because I've committed them all, I think. I may not have murdered anyone, but I've certainly had murderous thoughts and spoken murderous words.
Another thing I do is to think of the relationship as a spiritual exercise. We must learn to develop our Wills if we wish to become good servants of God. Spirituality isn't about feeling soft and mushy inside and living in a state of eternal sunshine. It often requires hard work and discipline. We can't be very useful to God if we are unable to control our passions.
There's one more thing I do to help myself act more lovingly, and that is to try to see the person through God's eyes. I mean, I can't imagine God saying things like, "Hey...this guy is a total asshole."
I shall end this with a brief quote from Schopenhauer....
"When you come into contact with a person, no matter whom, do not attempt an objective appreciation of him according to his worth or dignity. Do not consider his bad will or his narrow understanding and perverse ideas; as the former may easily lead you to hate and the latter to despise him; but fix your attention only upon his sufferings, his needs, his anxieties, his pains. Then you will always feel your kinship with him; and instead of hatred or contempt, you will experience the commiseration that alone is the peace to which the Gospel calls us."
Hope I've helped a little.
PS Prayer helps too.
Replies:
- Re(3): Listening to the notorious - By karen January 2, 2006 at 08:13:54 AM