Re (5): Further comments about Belief and Understanding.

Your attitude towards your sister reminded me very much of my sister's self-righteous, dismissive attitude towards me. I too have a bit of a philosophical side and I too have in the past defended my faith obnoxiously, considering others who did not see things my way unenlightened and stupid, beneath my consideration; but that was before I was a Christian.

As for what you do in the meantime, when heart and mind are out of sync, my point was that you can treat others with dignity and respect even when they don't agree with you or see things your way. You look at the plank in your own eye, which obviously you are trying to do. In the process, you don't have to act on the ugly things you feel or say the ugly things you think. Jesus didn't say think and feel about others as you would have them think and feel about you; He said do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

It's futile to wait to feel loving before treating others kindly or respectfully. You cannot change the way you feel and think; only Jesus can do that in you. That's the whole point behind being born again.

Have you ever read, "An Unknown Woman," by Alice Koller? It's an older book, but her angst and line of introspective thinking remind me very much of your own. She was a Jewish philosophy major who was struggling with what to believe just as you are. I'd be happy to see where a copy would be available for you. I think you would really relate to her story and would enjoy the book.

We are all guilty of seeing the speck in others' eyes while overlooking the plank in our own. We are all guilty of misinterpreting, misunderstanding, and assuming we know what others are thinking. Much of the time it is simply projection. We cannot know what others are thinking and feeling nearly as well as we know unconsciously what lies in the hidden depths of our own hearts.

• Re(6): Further comments about Belief and Understanding. - By Sara September 13, 2005 at 01:10:21 PM