Re(2): Holy Discontent: The God Question

Sandra,

I am sorry I have waited so long to reply. I wanted to take some time to gather together and carefully frame my thoughts. I like your statement of "Eric, as you know, there is no final arrival station except death," and also, as Loyaute here has written, I admire your honesty and your willingness to share your thoughts with me on your own struggles with the "God question." (I also like the thumb print on the forehead: that was a nice touch.) :) I also like the idea of Christ's seemingly pointless earthly ministry ending on a cross that resulted not in death, but in resurrection. Yet, as much as I sometimes doubt the existence of God or heaven, I ultimately believe and believe very strongly in the reality and existence of both. To me, the ultimate hope of Christianity is the resurrection of a new life united both with our Lord who has conquered death and our friends and family who have put their trust and hope in Him. For these reasons, I am troubled by your statement "it is a struggle toward disappearance of self both at the material and soul level." I do not believe that in our surrender to Christ we "disappear," so much as that we find ourselves again, renewed, regenerated, more whole, complete, and distinctly individual and unique than ever before. As a friend suggested to me this evening, God works through us, yet allows us the courtesy of our own identity: each person a unique and separate creation, not joined together in a vast, impersonal pool otherwise known as God or the Impersonal Absolute, but united with a Personal God who cares and cares deeply about each one of us. I like the idea of providing "places for our self to finally, thankfully, leak away," though again, I would question the meaning you seem to be attaching to "leaking away." It would seem that you have in mind more of a Hindu-like nirvana than a Biblical heaven, even if we allow that heaven is more of a spiritual dimension per se than a spatial locale.

I agree with Loyaute's sentiments of the "God/Universe" idea, that while God is omnipresent, He is nonetheless separate from His creation: that He is not merely immanent, but He forms a paradox of both immanence and transcendence in one: separate from, yet intimately involved in, with, and through His creation.

One final note, Sandra. I do not want you to feel like I am trying to back you into any corners or anything like this. However, the ideas you express sound to me like a form of pantheism, and having investigated this philosophical framework for myself, I have found it lacking: found that it only answered half the question, so to speak. I probably should have allowed you time to respond to Loyaute's thoughts, but the time suddenly seemed right to frame the thoughts that had been swirling around in my mind. This forum is a place for honesty, and it would be dishonest of me to pretend to agree with at least what I am hearing you say (and I am not suggesting I am necessarily hearing you accurately), when I do not, in fact, believe these ideas to be one hundred percent accurate. Like Loyaute, I would like to hear you out more fully on the matter: not like me the judge and you the person on trial, but as one honest seeker to another who is genuinely trying to understand, even if he thinks he disagrees with what he is hearing. Sound fair enough? I think we may have much to learn from the other, and I must admit, you have my curiosity piqued to the max. :)

God Bless,
Eric